unsporting actions..

what unsporting actions by the thai football..

totally nonsensical.. although it was a dubious penalty decision by the ref.. but that doesnt mean your team walked off the pitch after the decision is taken.. that is total unsporting..

and i dun understand why the officials bother talking the thais to continue the match.. such actions shud not be condone.. they shld be harshly punished for wat they have done.. its unacceptable..

you dun see ferguson recalling man utd team back to the bench when wrong decisions are made..

jus freaking disqualify or fine them... one of the worse match ever seen.. whole team running off the pitch...

crazy day

and i thought nth could get worse after receiving calls from camp to wake me up from my slp..

went to suntec area today.. prepared to spend quite a lot.. but wat i did not expect was for one side of my contact to drop.. so uncomfortable.. no spare one.. so i end up buying 1 whole box jus to replace tat single one.. changed a new brand.. much more comfortable..

and i tot i solve the problem.. onli come back to realise i bought 0.25 deg more.. see, one of my eye is 300 deg and the other is 350.. so i bought a 325 earlier.. i know its not a v gd thing to do.. but was living fine with it.. jus slightly blurred.. tats y i tend to see "lesser" things on contacts.. now, because i was caught in an unexpected situation, i bought a 350.. hopefully will not be too bad..

hahah tink i am really damaging my eyes..

anyway finally bought the adidas bag i wanted long ago.. stunning red color.. woo hot!!! but sadly, the green adidas shirt at the raffles city concept store out of stock.. i was onli dere 2 days ago, and now no stock!!! really suay sia..

bought jeans n polo tee from topman, tgt with the component wire for my ps2 and all.. spend 300 over..

wah heartbreak, pocket break.. sometimes its better to be bored and at home..

tryin my best to shed more kilos off.. until e pt i am afraid of getting wats tat sickness called? the one where one gets sick of food n vomit.. im getting e pt where once i eat i will get lotsa air in my stomach n start burping awy.. but i tink i am still doing fine.. because i still 偷吃.. hehe.. cant stand eating those tasteless food everyday..

anyway here are pics of one of mine guilty makan session.. (actually its one of mine frd's bday celeb.. and of cos no food pics.. to prevent myself from feeling guilty..)





白痴四人组..

what happen?!

what exactly happen..


my sispec days..

cant believe tats me? neither do i.. well at least i gt a target now when lookin into the mirror..

clothes hunting... NOT

as my frd say.. dis is duno the how many consecutive week we went out looking for clothes.. coming back with none..

hahaha okie i admit im quite fussy.. but really nv see any which i tink still can buy one.. haiz.. liddat how??

anyway here is a photo of the kawaii Aya Ueto.. for your viewing pleasure..



and of cos.. the 自恋狂 on the loose.. :



有态度吧??

burden.. DROPPED..

hahhaa..

today wake up.. feel so relaxed.. no more burden.. dun nid tink of soln to stupid problems..

going to enjoy my break before i ORD.. wooo.. dun care of anymore issues inside.. not my prob anymore..

gt 2 shows i wanna watch.. babel and happy bday.. but guess if i really wanna catch those shows i need to watch alone.. haiz..

the world is screwed

while we grow up learning how to be good, how to be responsible and how we should be kind and all..

in the nearing 2 years, i learnt that all those are bullshit..

you know it.. becos sadly, ppl who are responsible, kind and hardworking are treated like fools.. fools which can be exploited so that they can go higher.. stepping stones..

on the other hand, ppl who are e opposite are living happily.. ignorant of all the trouble brewing because of their attitude.. no wonder they say ignorance is bliss..

which is why i really tink education system should change.. teach us how to be ruthless.. selfish.. because thats how the reality is.. i really believe this is one of the major factors why many ppl cant do big things.. because we are not shrewd enuff..

2 years make me learn alot.. 人善被人欺.. one must be ruthless to succeed.. seems like im not destined to do great stuff..

today is the day i give up.. my efforts are going nowhere.. solutions rejected.. more problems are caused.. reasonings ignored.. stupid excuses surfaces.. childish tantrum end of day.. use rank loh.. thats how u win..

somehow the programs we watched on tv, hear on radio are all abt how good prevails.. but is tat the real truth.. because.. none of this is happening..

i wish i nv grow up.. because all i learn.. is that the world is twisted and screwed.. way beyond hope..

dont care

i dun care anymore.. i had enuff..

ppl go higher rank.. become more brainless, stubborn, eye gt stamp, refuse to see e truth, bully ppl, threaten ppl..

i am seriously wonder what have i did wrong.. mayb it was my over effort to try to solve his prob.. so much so that he is irritated by us and refuse to accept any solutions but to create more problem.. i gt a feeling he wanna sabo my boss.. trying to create all sorts of problems..

which all e more i dun understand.. if tat is the case.. pls stop finding us n find my boss.. tink our solutions are useless and we did not fulfill our work criteria, go ahead make noise.. y must u threaten to report to higher authority.. and best of all u threaten us, dun wanna let my boss know..

this is the most childish act i ever seen.. its a utter disgrace.. on one side we were taught to source for solutions, improvise, and on the other hand, ppl are doing us in.. PLS FARKING REMEMBER.. I AM JUS A TEMP STAFF.. MY OFFICE IS MADE UP OF TEMP STAFFs.. NO MATTER HOW MUCH U DECIDE TO BOYCOTT UR JOB, END OF DAY, WE ARE GONE, U STILL THERE..

sometimes i feel.. many regulars are wasting our nation resources.. becos of stupid ppl like these.. i have nv considered twice to sign on.. i am afraid i become dumb like them..

but there are also some professional regulars which i admire a lot.. their effort and knowledge is remarkable.. they put in more effort, try to solve problems.. and not because "this prob is caused by u.. u dun solve, i dun continue with my work"

fine.. den y dun u resign ur job when we leave..

which is why i strongly suggest to raise e pay of TEMP STAFFs.. u regulars cant survive without us.. stop treating us like shit while we slog our life out for u..

makes me wonder which type of temp staff is smarter, one who is irresponsible or one who is responsible..

as i come nearer to my end of service date.. reflecting back.. i am beginning to feel that my biggest mistake made during these 2 years, is trying to be a responsible worker, trying to be one who tries to do things to perfection.. which is a very sad truth..

embarrassed!!!

i am so embarrassed!!!

today while on the way home.. was stuck on the bus as there was a slight jam along the expressway.. as usual, i start to feel sleepy..

i started "nodding" away.. many a times i find myself "smelling" the hair of the other passenger standing in front of me..

as i stubbornly stand on and refuse to change my position.. i finally knocked into that passenger's head.. OMG so embarrassing!!! the bus is abt 3/4 full loh.. i start to apologise and he turned away.. so paiseh loh.. luckily or unluckily he alighted at the next stop.. which is like nearly 5 to 10 mins later..

what a day... gt punished for dozing off.. geez..

oh yea along the road from the mrt to my home are a lot of "i-dunno-wat" tree.. it has small "fruits" like durian, except its onli the size of a pea but still pricky.. yeah today while i was walking back.. one of them drop and hit me on the head..

my head today kanna punished so much sia.. buay tahan..

Monday post...

nope.. im not goin to complain abt how stupid n idiotic ppl at my workplace are.. neither am i going to complain abt how mentally tiring my job is..

becos for today.. i see tat my hardship thus far was rewarded.. although its at home..

yesh.. gt my starhub pt in my rm.. can watch cable tv in my rm le.. whopeee....

but den.. all comes at a price.. now gt a ugly looking white piping beside my door..

but den again.. nth is perfect right??

phobia

nv realise.. i tot i am jus bad in conversation..

sudden jot my mind tat..


i actually gt phobia of phone call..

coward..

since when was e last time i reach home and ate dinner at 9.45..

tat was v v v long ago..

i nv expect it to happen again today.. when i have only 51 days left..

reflecting my whole of this week.. (not tat my week is over but..) i feel v v weak.. i feel so cowardly tat if i were to stand aside and look at myself, i would feel sick.. this week only shows tat i cant get a single thing done by myself..

wondering y my brain couldnt turn ard.. it is because my sub-consciousness is telling me to slack..

i better pick up my pace.. if not i will die during the short yet packed feb..

to tink i have onli 51 days left.. no ppl will believe tat i have 51 days left if they see how much work i need to tahan..

or mayb it jus showed how ineffective n lousy i am..

ORD??

Its amazing..

i have never felt 52 days as if it was 100 days..

i wonder if its a test to me.. because i really feel like failing the test..

pls.. someone open my 2 eyes.. make me see that the effort n time i put in.. is worth it.. despite the fact that ppl ard me are not doing anything.. pls enlighten my brain.. make me understand that its okie for me to be the target board..

finally.. pls give me courage.. courage to refute work that shouldnt be mine at all..

There was a quote from a singer named Chen Sheng.. Say No when you should.. you are not a rubbish bin..

easy to say.. hard to execute..

ROAR

yes the lion roared!!!

Sg 11 - 0 Laos..

one of the biggest scoreline i ever seen.. with Noh Alam Shah scoring 7.. and the last goal was a spectacular bicycle kick..

however.. Laos were just pathetic.. their defence is practically not there.. lets hope our young lions can roar all e way to the end..

I wanna be a happy man..

ystd went to watch kungfu mahjong 3... hahaha v funni show.. quite entertaining..

the main lead falls in love with a ger whu brings bad luck to everyone.. den his mahjong hands are always terrible and he has to find a way to prevent his family business from other "vultures"

however, instead of focusing on the mahjong, i found a v simple yet meaningful msg.. that is not to blame ur bad luck.. instead be grateful tat it is not really the worst.. the way he sayang the mahjong tiles, treat them like friend.. and treat every bad situation with a smile..

tat is v v inspiring i tot.. especially this quote.. "要做人上人, 就必须忍人所忍不了, 受人所受不了"

it means to be a "top" man, u have to endure wat ppl cannot endure and to take things in your stride..

its hard.. especially for me since there are so many posts lamenting on my bad luck.. but i will try..


我要做人上人!!!

Sweet Sweet Dream

last nite.. i have my sweetest dream ever..

goes something like this..

i received a sms.. from 彤彤!!! i cant believe my eyes.. tot is some prank.. but it says tat i have won myself a house visit..

and she came over.. much to my surprise.. and took a photo with her.. got her signatures and then have a little talk.. i was probably too excited so much so that i suddenly woke up.. i tink.. becos i cant really remember wat happen next..

e last thing i can remember.. is that i really wanna contact her.. and was struggling whether to sms back the number.. and oh yea e alarm ring shortly after.. haiz..

i know all this things will nv happen.. i mean whu uses own phone to sms fans say wanna hse visit..

i know all this may sound desperate and stupid.. but then this really brighten up my morning.. i mean 彤彤 is real cute.. and this is my first sweet dream of the year.. so i tot wanna share.. not many times i gt gd things like this happen to me ya know..

v bad day

today my frd told me.. this week seem incredibly long..

tat i agree..

cos this week seem to have lotsa things to do.. or rather a lot of dirt being uncovered and we have to do e cleaning.. at e expense of taking e blame for all of it..

jus today.. was so busy for whole day.. couldnt have a proper break.. was practically all over the camp.. gt threatened by a high ranking officer, kanna scolding for making another officer drive ard 3 places n cannot find wat he want.. and e mystery of the missing red book which i have to craft an explanation letter.. (all of which i see in no position am i in e wrong.. wat have i done??)

to wake up in the morning to find liverpool conceding 6 goals to arsenal, getting to work to get screwed.. wat a day..

which comes to a conclusion with my frd.. why ppl whu ord in march got to suffer so much more den those whu ord in feb.. e difference is so huge.. and i mean HUGE.. during the nov dec period.. is already the end so work has already decreased.. however now is beginning.. and work is really beginning to stack.. but den those feb already clearing le.. so ppl will naturally find us this kind old birds..

my only consolation was that i gt a small award.. onli to find out tat my boss instead of selecting 3 for 3 months.. he selected onli 1.. which increase another prob for me too..

guess today my real threat was getting myself a long john dinner.. (disruptive to my effort of sliming dwn but i couldnt help it..) and to get a good night slp..

tml will be another fight again..

MV: 晴天娃娃

彤彤在新MV里粉口爱喔!!!

好正..

大家一起欣赏.. 多多支持黑涩会美眉!! 小小年纪出来跑节目当艺人不容易..

heart breaking

it is 80% confirmed tat ayumi wun have sg in her asia tour becos local concert organizer deem her performance too expensive to import.. sobs..

still undecided whether to go japan for tour, or go dere free n easy watch e concert, or change location to taiwan to watch e concert so that it is cheaper..

as it approach my 60 days left of service.. i realise another heartbreaking thing.. for the past 1 yr 10 months.. i learned pessimism.. i learned darkness.. i stop doing little gestures of kindness.. i dun see e pt of being kind anymore.. i dun see e pt of putting in my effort for other ppl.. y? y shld i work myself so hard only to find myself deriving pain, sadness, disappointment, more work, more trouble.. of which i can relieve myself of in the first place...

i find it hard to say "you are welcomed" when ppl say thank you to me.. is tat wat u really mean? or is tat jus another phrase so tat u can get me to work??

if i remove the mask before me.. would u still recognise who i am?? i am not as cheerful as u tink.. not as hardworking as you tink.. not as innocent as you tink..

i duno whu i am anymore.. i guess i am jus a coward trying to shun things away..

mystery..

i find it amazing..

especially after reading articles from newpaper, i am quite ascertain e world is going crazy..

firstly.. stop pressing charges against actress tat are too hot.. i mean i dun see why e young hot bollywood actress got to be charged one after another after kissing on screen for 17 times in like fully clad??? for obscenity charges?? come on.. y dun u charge e script writer instead for planning such a scene.. totally amazing.. have it den flaunt it!!! i wonder how they look at their miss india.. hmmm

next.. why would u go ard stabbing ppl 14 times for no particular reason.. jus becos he is walking his female frds home.. hello? they didnt stare, they didnt shout, they jus walk.. u expect them to run or fly?? its crazy to stab ppl liddat..

lastly parents are going crazy.. where gt such thing as guranteed place.. afiliated onli means a lower cut off pt.. not a sure place.. and furthermore.. if ur child cannot make it to the sch, wun it be better for ur child to enter a sch which will teach e kid better.. rather den to see ur child suffer e unnecessary stress..

weak

dunno since when.. i feel that i am grower weaker n weaker..

both mentally n physically..

i become less confident of myself.. i feel more nervous of my everyday life.. i feel more cowardly den ever.. so much so i have nv been so low in my life ever..

why??

hope i can "recover" and stop the slump..

obsession?? no way!!!

i know my blog recently always gt jap ger pic.. but trust me.. dun read too deep into that..

just that because of all these gers.. i really wanna watch their drama.. and no thnx to the disrupted net cable.. unable to watch the streams.. zzz... voiding me of a lot of activities..

so what can i do?? find pic loh..

65 days.. nv seem short enuff.. and oooh.. overseas soon??

ayumi will have her concert at taipei on 24 mar.. other performance in jap will be in may, jun.. so i am really kinda lost here.. if i go jap in may or jun, totally thwart messy in the days b4 i enter NUS.. if i go taipei in mar for the concert and then go jap in apr.. cash flow prob!!!! another option is to go jap immediately after i take my ic to rush for the first 2 shows.. argh.. dilemma.. and also free n easy or tour??!! ARGH..

Star Sign.. u believe??

jus saw a variety show..

cant believe my eyes.. 2007 年最没桃花运的是是處女座欸!!! 有桃花也是烂桃花.. 伤害性的..

for 2007 i shall not believe in star sign..

not tat i usually do but i do read sometimes..

definitely not this yr.. i dun wanna believe it..

Erika Toda

kawaii desho??



found in on the jdrama webbie i said earlier.. pic originated from the HK Premier of the movie.. anyway found a fantastic solution to my draggy youtube.. not as content rich as youtube but den..

http://stage6.divx.com

got to register though but its free..

anyway news abt Erika Toda.. She will be voice acting in a PS3 title: GENJI - Days of the Last Blade..

PS3 "GENJI - Days of the Last Blade" official site
http://www.jp.playstation.com/scej/title/genji_ps3/

video clip : the making of & interview
http://www.jp.playstation.com/movie/mv/asx/mv_genji_todaerika.asx

lolipop anyone?? e apple on her hand is mine..





damn it.. we probably wun have any thing near this.. much less jstars coming dwn here.. all end up in taiwan n hk.. feelin neglected here...

after going thru 49 pages of forum.. from tiny pics i am getting like a folder full of her.. will create my own wallpaper soon.. (again jus some simple cut n paste thingy..) will put a small one here while i enjoy e big piece.. hee...

lastly hope taiwan can recover quickly from the quake.. (e slow internet spd is driving me crazy.. but i will not be inhumane enuff to 4get e victims of the quake..)

left 5 hrs.. oyasumi..

Quote

saw this quote in newpaper.. from the movie blood diamond..

"sometimes i wonder if God will forgive us for what we did to each other. Then i look around and realise God left this place a long time ago."

make ur mind think.. this quote probably sums up what i learned during my 2 yrs of service..

67 days n counting..

SUGOII

watched the movie vers of 1 litre of tears.. didnt know that the actress this time is Asae Oonishi.. e one whu appeared as Aya's room mate whu suffered e same disease..

wats more amazing is that e net actually gt so little info abt her.. (she starred in kamen rider hibiki..) she is so sweet looking..

onli found one webbie though.. those pic are from her older times.. so a lot of those bikini shoots.. well apparently lot of them started this way..

here is one nice lookin one..


the movie is slightly diff from the drama series.. not as tear inducing but not tat bad.. Asae definitely does not fare worse den erika sawajiri.. both v sweet.. mayb becos i watched e drama already.. e movie vers kinda not as outstanding.. probably becos its onli 1 and a half hrs so cannot bring out e sadness n tears.. anyway tat will be sensationalizing the true story anyway..

really recommend this drama.. v v nice.. if possible i want to watch shinobi.. also acted by erika sawajiri..

Happy New Year!!!

Finally.. 2006 is finished.. tat means.. yes 3 more months to ORD LO...

2006 is e year i tink i grew up.. i saw a lot of things which make me who i am now..

i can no longer smile like before.. its not so innocent anymore.. e world has changed.. i see no hope.. and i treasure little fond memories i have.. 2006 is the year my heart grew cold n grey.. after i see things in the little 2 yrs of NS, it taught me not how to be a man n so on.. instead.. it taught me abt life.. abt how doing ur best isnt always e best decision.. is abt sometimes, being helpful to others is like stabbing ur own heart with a knife.. tats wat i learnt..

so for 2007.. i hope to see something new.. i hope my heart can be like b4.. i hope tat it will not be caged up.. and hope someone can show me that the world can be beautiful and not like the one tat filled my heart with endless pessimism.. i feel sometimes i am so heartless now n i hope it can be changed..

so i am really kinda looking fwd to 2007.. my naive side of me hope all the negative things n thoughts can jus fade away..

but really.. the 1st thing i really wish to see happen.. is for my weight to go dwn.. hahaha trying freaking hard.. i know i am lazy n lack motivation n the consistency.. but i will try..

last but not least.. HAPPY NEW YR.. wish u have a year of many returns..